December 9, 2002

Dear Diary,

What a weekend!! So many things to do and see. On Friday I went on an audition for a one-line role for the movie Legally Blond 2. It was great. It was an audition, which made me feel productive, and at the same time it was so short that I was in and out before I could get nervous. Believe you me, that is a VERY good thing. You get me nervous and in the auditioning room too long and next thing you know I am talking about what my penis plans to do on its summer vacation. You laugh thinking this to be a joke but something like this has happened before and, knowing me, will most likely happen again.

Then came Saturday, the big day. The day of the….ACTORS'……….NETWORK…..HOLIDAY……PARTY!!! But not so fast. Before you can have a party you have to a place hospitable enough to have the party. The last thing I remember was Kevin E. West, founder of the Actors' Network, asking me into his office. Four martinis later I had unwittingly agreed to help him set up the next afternoon in exchange for "3 comely lasses of virtue true." While I kept up my end of the bargain, Kevin has yet to come through on his end. After helping, I went home and took a shower, shaved, put on my hot and sexy fit, and came back to enjoy the fruits of my labor Well, first order of the day was to get a glass of wine. The second order of the day was to get a second glass of wine. You know what, let's have the next two orders of the day be getting wine as well. Cool so now where are we? Okay, so I guess the fifth order of the day would have to have been, MAKE AN ASS OUT OF MYSELF in front of as many INDUSTY GUESTS as possible. Well it's a good thing that there were so many of them there. It made my job so much easier. The upside is that they will definitely remember me. Sure, they will remember me as "that wino at the party" but they WILL remember me. Well I sobered up drove home and slept HARD. I mean HARD. The kind of deep sleep that you wake up to find kids poking you with a stick cause they thing you're dead and then they scatter in terror when you wake up-kind of hard. Well, needless to say I can't wait until next year's holiday party 'cause there are plenty more casting directors, agents, and producers to embarrass myself in front of. (sigh) Talk to you later diary.

MN